2014 – 074 White Van Man’s Danifesto

‘White Van Dan’ unveils his vision for the country

Posted 17 hours ago by Matthew Champion in news

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The Rochester resident who shot to prominence after a Labour MP lost her job in the shadow cabinet for tweeting a picture of his house on the day of a by-election has unveiled his six-point plan for the country.

Dan Ware, predictably dubbed ‘White Van Dan’, published his… ‘Danifesto’ in the Sunnewspaper despite admitting to not remembering the last time he voted.

The car dealer and sometime cage-fighter’s “no-nonsense plan for a better Britain” is:

Welfare state: Work for four years after you leave school before you can claim benefits.

Immigration: Copy the Aussies. If people show up uninvited, send them back.

Transport: Public transport costs are too high. More investment in roads too.

Education: Better discipline. Kids are too mouthy now, not like when we had the cane.

Justice: Tougher sentences for murderers. And jail those who burn the poppy.

Taxes: A killer for self-employed people like me. Start-ups need more breaks.

Shadow attorney general Emily Thornberry was forced to step down by an apparently furious Ed Miliband after she tweeted a picture of Mr Ware’s house, which had three England flags draped outside and a white van parked in the drive.

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